Sherlock Holmes syndrome…..

I have of late taken to re-reading the complete Sherlock Holmes, a volume I was much taken with when I first read it as a youth. I am still entertained by the  meticulous observations carried out by my fictional hero. However, I am somewhat perplexed as this appears to have had a substantial effect on my vocabulary and dare I say, has made  a deleterious change to my syntagmatic construction, in the sense that my mode of communication seems to have been transmogrified into that of an earlier era, and I am trapped in the company of this anachronistic tongue!  Fearing that this may contine and worsen –  I am already contemplating the purchase of a briar pipe, and a small landau – – I would be more than appreciative if other sufferers would offer their own experiences to provide me some hope of a rapid return to the present day.

Yours faithfully,

Rowland Jones

PS A colleague has suggested that the works of a colonial writer of the name James Ellroy might provide an aid to recovery. Though I am not familiar with his prose, I am assured that the subject matter, in its concern of the workings of the underworld and the criminal classes, is not dis-similar to that of Mr Holmes, though I gather his style is somewhat more direct. Could anyone clarify these details in the hope of resolving this unfortunate situation?

PPS An earlier occurrence with the work of Ernest Hemingway was less traumatic, (though my consumption of alcohol increased ten-fold) since the presence of large cetaceans in rural Italy is rare. A small dose of Proust was sufficient to return me to my bed until I had achieved a full recovery and had a shave.